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Voltaire

"Candide"

"
Candide was convinced and acknowledged that Martin was in the right.
They sat down to table with Pacquette and the Theatin; the
entertainment was agreeable, and towards the end they began to
converse together with some freedom.
"Father," said Candide to the friar, "you seem to me to enjoy a
state of happiness that even kings might envy; joy and health are
painted in your countenance. You have a pretty wench to divert you;
and you seem to be perfectly well contented with your condition as a
Theatin."
"Faith, sir," said Friar Giroflee, "I wish with all my soul the
Theatins were every one of them at the bottom of the sea. I have
been tempted a thousand times to set fire to the monastery and go
and turn Turk. My parents obliged me, at the age of fifteen, to put on
this detestable habit only to increase the fortune of an elder brother
of mine, whom God confound! jealousy, discord, and fury, reside in our
monastery. It is true I have preached often paltry sermons, by which I
have got a little money, part of which the prior robs me of, and the
remainder helps to pay my girls; but, not withstanding, at night, when
I go hence to my monastery, I am ready to dash my brains against the
walls of the dormitory; and this is the case with all the rest of
our fraternity.


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