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Carleton, William, 1794-1869

"Phelim Otoole's Courtship and Other Stories Traits And Stories Of The Irish Peasantry, The Works of William Carleton, Volume Three"

His vile, dingy dun bristles stood out in all
directions from his head, which was so shaped as to defy admeasurement;
the little rascal's body was equally ill-made, and as for his limbs,
we have already described them, as reaping-hooks of flesh and blood,
terminated by a pair of lark-heeled feet, as flat as smoothing-irons.
Now, be it known, that notwithstanding these disadvantages, little Toal
looked upon himself as an Adonis upon a small scale, and did certainly
believe that scarcely any female on whom he threw his fascinating eye
could resist being enamored of him. This, of course, having become
generally known, was taken advantage of, and many a merry country girl
amused both herself and others at his expenses while he imagined her to
be perfectly serious.
"Then how did you escape at all," said Frank--"you that the girls are so
fond of?"
"You may well ax," said Toal; "but at any rate, it's the divil entirely
to have them too fond of you. There's raison in every thing, but wanst
a woman takes a strong fancy to the cut of your face, you're done for,
until you get rid of her. Throth I suffered as much persecution that way
as would make a good batch o' marthyrs. However, what can one do?"
"It's a hard case, Toal," said Art; "an' I b'lieve you're as badly off,
if not worse, now than ever."
"In that respect," replied Toal, "I'm ladin' the life of a murdherer.


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