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Buchan, John, 1875-1940

"The Half-Hearted"

Then came the thought of his blindness, and in a
great horror of self-mistrust he seemed to see throughout it all his
criminal folly. He, poor fool, had been pleasing himself with dreams of
a meeting, when all the while the other man had been the real lover.
She had despised him, spared not a thought for him save as a pleasing
idler; and he--that he should ever have ventured for one second to hope!
Curiously enough, for the first time he thought of Stocks with respect;
to have won the girl seemed in itself the proof of dignity and worth.
"Thanks very much for telling me. I am glad I know. No, I don't think
I'll go into the house yet."
* * * * *
The days passed and Alice waited with anxious heart for the coming of
the very laggard Lewis. To-day he will come, she said each morning; and
evening found her--poor heart!--still expectant. She told herself a
thousand times that it was sheer folly. He meant nothing, it was a mere
fashion of speech; and then her heart would revolt and bid common sense
be silent. He came indeed with some of the Etterick party on a formal
call, but this was clearly not the fulfilment of his promise. So the
girl waited and despaired, while the truant at Etterick was breaking his
heart for the unattainable.
Mr. Stocks, having won the official consent, conducted his suit with
commendable discretion.


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