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Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville), 1881-1975

"A Man of Means"

A child could have guessed it. You have just
come to the decision--in my opinion a thoroughly sensible one--that
your engagement to her ladyship can not be allowed to go on. You are
quite right, sir. It won't do."
Personal magnetism covers a multitude of sins. Roland was perfectly
well aware that he ought not to be standing here chatting over his and
Lady Eva's intimate affairs with a butler; but such was Teal's
magnetism that he was quite unable to do the right thing and tell him
to mind his own business. "Teal, you forget yourself!" would have
covered the situation. Roland, however, was physically incapable of
saying "Teal, you forget yourself!" The bird knows all the time that he
ought not to stand talking to the snake, but he is incapable of ending
the conversation. Roland was conscious of a momentary wish that he was
the sort of man who could tell butlers that they forgot themselves. But
then that sort of man would never be in this sort of trouble. The
"Teal, you forget yourself" type of man would be a first-class shot, a
plus golfer, and would certainly consider himself extremely lucky to be
engaged to Lady Eva.


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