Well--this
time has come, and what do I find? Truly it is no Aladdin-palace,
glittering with gold and gems. It is more like a cavernous depth,
stored with rubbish, and from its dark deeps comes up an earthy
odour, that almost suffocates my spirit. But this is my all, and I
must descend from the life of the heart to the life of the mind, and
scan my unsatisfactory possessions.
Well, here is a world of childish, school-day lumber. Once it was a
great delight to me to learn that the world was round, and not
square; but I cannot see that a knowledge of that fact affords me
any great satisfaction now, for it has shaped itself to me as an
acute angle. And the earth's surface! how I used to glow with the
excitement of the bare thought of Rome! and Athens! and
Constantinople! and their thrilling histories and wonders of art,
and beauties of nature, seemed to me an indefinite world of
unattainable delight and ecstasy. But now, I have lived in all these
places, and the light and glory have gone. They have fallen within
the freezing light of reason. They are no longer like beautiful
dreams to me. They are squared down into fixed, unalterable facts. I
cannot gild them with any light of fancy; and I cannot extract from
them anything like the delight of my childhood.
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